Monday, June 11, 2007

Shaq's Big Challenge: Not Accidently Crushing Children

Bored of watching the Spurs manhandle the Cavs in a one-sided NBA Finals series? I know I am but Shaq, once again, comes to the rescue. Diesel is signed on to battle childhood obesity in his new series with ABC, “Shaq’s Big Challenge”.
O’Neal has selected a crack team of the worlds best scientific minds (too bad he couldn’t just clone 6 versions of himself) to help him pummel these children into shape. Shaq's own physician and trainer, Dr. Carlon "Doc" Colker, personal trainer Tarik Tyler, nutritionist Dr. Joy Bauer, childhood obesity expert Dr. William Muinos, M.D. from Miami Children's Hospital, Food Network celebrity chef Tyler Florence and Shaq's Louisiana State University coach Dale Brow are all there to do the “sciency crap” for Big Aristotle.
Shaquille O’Neal will help 6 lucky Floridian middle-schoolers personally, through good diet and exercise to the point that they are able to see their own toes. But the fun doesn’t stop there, after helping these children, “Dr. Diesel’s Dream Team of Nutritionologists” will attempt to change the way the state of Florida deals with children’s health all throughout the state. Shaq for governor, anyone? No matter what level of government Shaq ends up in, here’s hoping that he truly makes a difference for the children.
In semi-related news, Shaq could once spin on his head as parts of his break-dance routine, but he gained too much weight and he can’t do it anymore without breaking his neck.

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